I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
