this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
