yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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