Bisexual people are plain selfish.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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