Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Randomize
