Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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