I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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