After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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