Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize