is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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