I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
this boner is exhausting
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
