honey bunches of taint.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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