There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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