**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
