i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
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