420 ftw
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
