i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
