shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
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