have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
