i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
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