I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
