I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
it hurts more in the daytime
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Randomize