You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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