you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
don't judge my taste in strippers
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
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