i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
