worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
