I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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