Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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