We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I need a burrito and a hug.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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