someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize