she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
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