I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize