oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Randomize
