It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
