At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
