Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Randomize
