Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
My ass is underappreciated
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
