I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
