Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
