It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
When did angry sex become our thing?
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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