What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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