And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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