We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize
