All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Porn is love you can see.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
