I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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