went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
