people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
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