you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize