Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
