Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize